Sometimes I Need Help Climbing Out.
Non-dual teachings are the permanent handholds that are always there.
I woke up this morning feeling grumpy and disoriented.
Yesterday I found that I had written a large check for a project from the wrong bank account, resulting in a chain of myriad complications. My beloved dog has an injury that must be addressed by rest and when I let her out this morning I neglected to keep her from running pellmell across our property after her enemy, the quail.
I felt like a mess.
In an unusual turn of events, instead of my trying to figure out how to get out of this state, I began noticing all the help that was already there.
I was in a deep, dark and familiar hole; looking up at the blue sky which was far, far way. But slowly, as my eyes adjusted, I started to see handholds that had already been placed there.
The first was reading, which I have become accustomed to doing every morning before I jump in to action. Nisargadatta was right there reminding me that all this is just a kerfuffle in an imaginary identity.
I don’t always meditate, but lately I am finding it soothing. Part of my Forest Dweller time has been the realization that I feel happier when I take care of my sensitive nervous system. Another handhold, my mantra and the practice, given through Transcendental Meditation.
I was beginning to see some daylight.
It is becoming more obvious how writing supports me. Journaling- a place to have some wonderful talks with myself and figure out what is actually happening for me. Many of us understand that writing can be the voice of the Divine coming through. Another handhold includes a group of listeners on Substack that understand and reflect back these happenings.
Many, many writers have been handholds for me. Anne Lamott’s book came to mind today as I moved out of the hole. The title? Help Thanks Wow: Three Essential Prayers. These are the prayers I moved through today.
Non-dual teachings are the permanent handholds that are always there when I need them. I am so grateful that the circumstances in my life led me here. I am extremely lucky to have a living Advaita teacher, Erin Reese, in my life. She has guided me across some very rocky territory over the years and I honor her wisdom and her commitment to me.
I am not saying this is a formula for exiting the hole when you find yourself there, but ‘Help!’ is a good place to start.
With much love,
Heidi




love the authenticity of your voice and the reduction(almost elimination )of the striving to be other than the way we are. A great reminder By the way, I look at a picture of the solar system(or milky way) from time to time with a little x on it that says "you are here crying in the shower before work" always brings a smile to my face and does not negate the emotion I am experiencing, just puts it in perspective.....
A beautiful nod to Reality which includes Daily Living, foibles, victories, and the wisdom to know what is needed.