Lately there have just been too many words. I have enjoyed writing about my life, what I have learned and am learning. I had hoped I could continue on in that vein for a good long time. And I probably will.
But this week the cart got overturned when a sentence came to me out of nowhere- “You are done with it ALL.”
WHOA. Wait a minute-ALL. Really? What the hell does that mean? Done with caring about my kids and grandkids? Doing what I can to have my husband and I stay healthy? Feeding the dog? Voting? Growing tomatoes?
I have accepted in the last several years that thinking I can control life is beyond my ability. With that came so much gratitude for the life I have been given.
I admit that if anyone asked me, I would probably have said I am guided quite a bit by intuition. Yep, just me and my intuition, we’re going to get together and figure out what should happen. Thank goodness I am around to help it decide which is the best way for me to go!
This weekend I took a mini-retreat by myself to the beach. It is especially good in the Forest Dweller years to deeply realize that you enjoy your own company. Yet I could feel a message wanting to come out that was impossible for me to see. Sometimes you just have to wait and be patient.
The Advaita teacher Bala once pointed to the importance of messages that “seem to come from outside of you.” God’s voice sounds more dramatic, but basically I noticed this one sentence coming to me from nowhere. Frankly, it didn’t feel like good news.
You are done with it ALL.
The more I sit with it, the more simple and true it seems.
In every moment I AM done with it all. I have no idea what doing will happen in the next moment. The opposite of being done is not being done. What a relief to live being done!
In my early spiritual seeking, I struggled mightily with the idea of giving up all attachments, which seemed common to many spiritual paths. It felt so cold and final and unloving. I was pretty clear I wouldn’t be doing that. No matter what golden palace of enlightenment might be awaiting me.
The message I received intrigued me and shifted the way I see. To use words to describe this is too much and also isn’t really enough.
As Ramesh said:
“Understand that nothing happens
unless it is God's will and
do what you like.
What can be simpler than that?”
Thank you for reading and commenting!
MMMmmm, nectar to the soul. Thank you
No words.. just a :)