I have an seemingly automatic reaction when people I meet want to be called by their titles/degrees. I appreciate the effort they put in to get their degrees and as a kinesthetic learner it was simply not my path to get more than a bachelor’s degree. I like calling people by their names 🙏🏼
Me too! It just makes things easier! Besides I am horrible at remembering peoples’ titles. What prompted this post is an incident when I was introducing an acquaintance to a friend. The acquaintance was a particular type of neurologist which I forgot to include in my introduction- just “neurologist” was not enough for him- and he promptly pointed that out. It was awkward! “George” is much easier, but don’t count on me to always remember that either😂.
The one exception is that I personally wouldn't resist going back to use of Mr., Miss, etc in the sense of providing some polite distance until one is ready to formalize. It's one of the reasons I appreciated the use of "du" und "Sie" in German (and other languages' equivalent). I know it's considered old-fashioned or worse these days, but having a distinction between association/acquaintanceship and friendship/familiar could be navigated easier. Certainly other problems may arise too (classism, for instance). But I do like the respectfulness in general. Love to hear others' input.
Oh wait, is that in the catalog of acceptable, credentialed replies?
Sincerely. I appreciate this!
You write, "I am bored with these discussions." Yes, indeed!
I am bored with discussions that, in general, are excluding of embodiment. You point to this here:
"I want to know the last time you felt really jealous, what you are reading, what depresses you and what lights you up and, if you have one, how your spiritual path is unfolding/has unfolded. But mainly I want to feel interested and content in your presence."
When a person is present with what's actually here, what's actually arising, then I am interested. That's what makes a discussion or encounter alive.
I say this because too many of us are still being gaslit or gaslighting ourselves, feeling depleted or confused or even sick after attempting exchanges with those who are cut off from themselves, from Life.
Credentials are uninteresting to me, too. In the doctor's office, therapist's office, I want to know if you are present, if you are human, and are in contact with your gut and your heart and your soulfulness.
Listening to the elite "expert" chiding the novice... being told to unquestioningly "follow the science"...
No.
I'll be over here, having tea with the herbalist midwife and the poet. And the monk who loves Nothing most of all.
Wow! Thank you for continuing to flesh out-embody- what I am wanting to point out here!
Sometimes the weight of the credentials, as you say, work either to gaslight others or ourselves. It’s so painful. Haha “follow the science” can be a dog whistle for noticing when this is happening.
Tea with the herbalist and the monk sounds like where I want to spend my time. And don’t forget the dog!
I appreciate your thoughtful (and poetic) comments.❤️
I have an seemingly automatic reaction when people I meet want to be called by their titles/degrees. I appreciate the effort they put in to get their degrees and as a kinesthetic learner it was simply not my path to get more than a bachelor’s degree. I like calling people by their names 🙏🏼
Me too! It just makes things easier! Besides I am horrible at remembering peoples’ titles. What prompted this post is an incident when I was introducing an acquaintance to a friend. The acquaintance was a particular type of neurologist which I forgot to include in my introduction- just “neurologist” was not enough for him- and he promptly pointed that out. It was awkward! “George” is much easier, but don’t count on me to always remember that either😂.
Thanks for commenting!
I hear this, Alan!
The one exception is that I personally wouldn't resist going back to use of Mr., Miss, etc in the sense of providing some polite distance until one is ready to formalize. It's one of the reasons I appreciated the use of "du" und "Sie" in German (and other languages' equivalent). I know it's considered old-fashioned or worse these days, but having a distinction between association/acquaintanceship and friendship/familiar could be navigated easier. Certainly other problems may arise too (classism, for instance). But I do like the respectfulness in general. Love to hear others' input.
My two pence!
Good point, Erin! So many languages have this formal/familiar distinction built in. English, not so much.
I am traveling in Italy right now and am often called ‘madame’ in a public settings. I like it! I do feel respected and recognized by this.
Another title given in Hawaii to older women is “Auntie”. I love this. I feel immediately included and honored by it.
Glad to have your two pence!
Beautifully written and I can really relate. Thank you for the wonderful reminder Heidi.
Thanks, Persephone!❤️
Fantastic! Or, as I wanted to write:
Fanfuckingtastic!
Oh wait, is that in the catalog of acceptable, credentialed replies?
Sincerely. I appreciate this!
You write, "I am bored with these discussions." Yes, indeed!
I am bored with discussions that, in general, are excluding of embodiment. You point to this here:
"I want to know the last time you felt really jealous, what you are reading, what depresses you and what lights you up and, if you have one, how your spiritual path is unfolding/has unfolded. But mainly I want to feel interested and content in your presence."
When a person is present with what's actually here, what's actually arising, then I am interested. That's what makes a discussion or encounter alive.
I say this because too many of us are still being gaslit or gaslighting ourselves, feeling depleted or confused or even sick after attempting exchanges with those who are cut off from themselves, from Life.
Credentials are uninteresting to me, too. In the doctor's office, therapist's office, I want to know if you are present, if you are human, and are in contact with your gut and your heart and your soulfulness.
Listening to the elite "expert" chiding the novice... being told to unquestioningly "follow the science"...
No.
I'll be over here, having tea with the herbalist midwife and the poet. And the monk who loves Nothing most of all.
And the cat.
Thank you, Heidi.
Wow! Thank you for continuing to flesh out-embody- what I am wanting to point out here!
Sometimes the weight of the credentials, as you say, work either to gaslight others or ourselves. It’s so painful. Haha “follow the science” can be a dog whistle for noticing when this is happening.
Tea with the herbalist and the monk sounds like where I want to spend my time. And don’t forget the dog!
I appreciate your thoughtful (and poetic) comments.❤️