23 Comments
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Seth Bartlett's avatar

Glad to hear you've still got that fire in your belly. Reminds me of Alison 🤣

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Heidi Singfield's avatar

Thanks, Seth. Can’t put it out even if I wanted to!♥️

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ERIN REESE's avatar

Of course I love this! My input, though?

You are *squawking*. There is a real difference between squawking and expressing vs. arguing.

Arguing comes with an identified belief (calcified) that you should have it your way. Different than a preference. There is a lack of understanding that everything is unfolding perfectly. There is a lingering belief in control.

When all that identification goes...well...it's a squawking, wild and free, Forest Dwelling Bird.

Exactly as You Are...

🦜🦜🦜

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Heidi Singfield's avatar

I love this distinction! Really? Squawking vs arguing? I am a Squawker, not an Arguer in your definition!

And I appreciate your bringing in the distinction between belief that you should have your way and your preference that you do.

Both these clarifications leave a lot of room for this squawking forest bird.

Let the good times roll!🤣

Thank you!

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Alan Cahn's avatar

Resistance is futile. I grew up in a family of arguers(my dad primarily) and arguing is generally accepted as part of the the Jewish Tradition. We even argue with God. I like it as a strategy done at choice rather than as a reflexive/reactive activity. I also like being able to do it without any anger.

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Heidi Singfield's avatar

Wow- arguing without anger. Definitely not an idea I am familiar with! I will explore this possibility.

I love the idea of arguing being accepted. In my family it was ‘just not done’. Suppressed irritation was allowed, but raised voices were practically a moral failure.

Re strategy and choice, I guess as a Forest Dweller now for me that feels too complicated. If arguing comes up, I’ll see where it goes.

Thanks for these insights, Alan!

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ERIN REESE's avatar

Another fun nickname...Old Yeller. 😂😂😂

Keith and I also got into a tizzy the other day regarding yardwork and removal of dead plants. 🪏Guess what?! It worked. Action happened! Who knew! 🤣

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Heidi Singfield's avatar

That is so funny- haha Old Yeller.

Yes it can work! I drove off in a tiff to run an errand. When I came back the dead plant had been removed!🎉

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Denise Brofman's avatar

This was great today Heidi. I’m a covert arguer. I argue with people in my head but not out loud, for the most part. However I never had a problem arguing with Al. I think to myself “what a bitch”! But leaves me wondering why?, do I feel safe with him? Do I feel I’m so right that I have to argue… So you got me thinking, thanks! ❤️

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Heidi Singfield's avatar

Thanks, Denise!

I like Erin’s comment about being Squawkers, not Arguers.

It is a real gift to have someone with whom you can squawk to your heart’s content and still feel safe. Think you are right on about this.

If being fiery is there, it is just there. I have started to love seeing this energy in others.

I will say that the words we use to define ourselves are often judgmental- bitchy, neurotic, etc.

My favorite now is fiery🐦‍🔥Seems to fit better.

Appreciate your comments!♥️

Appreciate your comments!

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ERIN REESE's avatar

Cheers to the fiery ones! 🌋🔥🐦‍🔥(Our men love it, btw. Wouldn't want us any other way...so I've heard.) ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

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Heidi Singfield's avatar

Good to remember! I asked Norm about it and he said he’s not sure about that!😂

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ERIN REESE's avatar

Bwahahaha!!!!!

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Holger Hubbs's avatar

Do you really think that this is an appropriate way to write a post, with all those words, meanings, concepts, references! We need to talk about that 😂

I like Ramesh's pointer: anger is biological.

The programs run their course;

other programs judge other programs.

So embarrassing 😇

Who cares, but love.

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Heidi Singfield's avatar

Haha great point, Holger!

Yet somehow I continue to write these things. We do end up passing time in some manner.

I love “programs run their course; other programs judge other programs.” And sometimes embarrassment happens😂

I have been returning to another quote from Ramesh recently- “Just keep doing what you are doing, knowing you are not the doer". So far, so good!

I have been enjoying this substacker below who talks about writing in a way that resonates with me.

How to write without words etc- we will see what happens☺️

Thank you so much for reading and commenting!

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Youri Hermes's avatar

So glad it speaks to you, @Heidi Singfield

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ERIN REESE's avatar

Timepass! 🌈🌋🦋🥂🍰🐑🎨🦜 We enjoy writing. Plus, it happens. I love it.

The development (and demise) continue.

I love your writing so much!

Let the Lila play. Fun!

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Holger Hubbs's avatar

Do you Zoom?

I find open dialogue with truth lovers very inspiring.

https://GardenOfFriends.com

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Heidi Singfield's avatar

Thanks for the invite, Holger.

I love seeing the faces of the people who join on the website.

It’s wonderful that you are hosting this gathering. It can be so lonely as often there is no one nearby to understand nor

share what you are seeing.

For quite a while I have been in a hermit mode, so will say no for now.

I am glad to know you all are there!

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Holger Hubbs's avatar

Feel welcome to join at the

https://GardenOfFriends.com

Maybe alone, but not lonely 🤗

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Teri Derr's avatar

Love the picture:) I am tending toward releasing attachment and letting go of the emotional fight. It’s exhausting. ❤️

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Heidi Singfield's avatar

Yes that’s so great IF you can! I seemed to be designed to make a squawk😂Accepting that gives me a lot of freedom. For me it’s more exhausting to try to stop it.

Thanks for commenting, Teri!❤️‍🔥

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