Thank you Heidi. Somehow your acceptance of your irritation helps me feel more accepting of my skepticism and cynicism, traits I'm not enamored with but have in abundance. Rather than try and get rid of them (impossible?) maybe I can offer the simple prayer "G*d, just for today, don't let me be an a**hole". Thank you for your writing and sharing!
I love that prayer, Keith! I’m glad this hit a chord. One thing I am curious about is where we get this need to get rid of traits. For me, it is feeling I don’t fit in to the accepted norm.
I remember hearing once about Ramesh’s young granddaughter who was apparently quite spirited. Her mom was constantly trying to manage her. When once again she had done something she shouldn’t have and was reprimanded, she turned to her mom and said “But Mommy, I am just doing what God wants me to do.”
I am wondering where your cynicism and skepticism might actually be a gift that sets someone on a different path. Maybe some apple carts need to be turned over!
My first thought: it is *precisely* the irritation that polishes the diamond! 💎 It's perfect!
I love Irritated Heidi. I'm irritated, too. It is irritation that is the sand in the oyster that creates the pearl. Without irritation, I'm unmotivated to write or teach or create podcasts which do seem to benefit some. If I'm not bothered, I don't write. Nothing to respond to. Something has to itch! We just label it positive or negative, desirable or undesirable.
One last offering: if irritation arises - big, small or strangely indefinable - it immediately defuses into Embodied Awareness (out of the head) by claiming it. Oftentimes, you'll find me bopping around the house like a chicken, repeating, "I'm upset! I'm upset," in the moment. 🐓 Just expressing "upsetness" or irritation. No problem, no analysis - simply being the experiencing of upsetness.
Cheers to being polished!
(And, luckily I'm a coffee drinker so I've no need to invite anything to tea. 😂)
A deep bow to you, and Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj - my angry, irritable, beloved grandteacher - the master.🙏🏽
I am now officially changing being irritated to being bothered!
Yes- being bothered keeps me energized and on fire about things! I love this perspective.
I appreciate the image of defusion when a trait is claimed. That is brilliant! I have called that relief which is also true, but the experience more accurately feels like fog being blown away.
That’s quite a picture of your running around squawking😂
I also want to clarify a subtle difference between "claimed" which can easily turn into identification, and "being one with" or presencing with an energy quality. I know you know this. It's always present time. The one who is angry or bothered doesn't exist in the next moment. Time collapses and no one is there to be angry. Just the staccato uprising and disappearing.
In fact, it's involvement in time and space that create the idea of an angry person or any thing at all!
Thank you Heidi. Somehow your acceptance of your irritation helps me feel more accepting of my skepticism and cynicism, traits I'm not enamored with but have in abundance. Rather than try and get rid of them (impossible?) maybe I can offer the simple prayer "G*d, just for today, don't let me be an a**hole". Thank you for your writing and sharing!
I love that prayer, Keith! I’m glad this hit a chord. One thing I am curious about is where we get this need to get rid of traits. For me, it is feeling I don’t fit in to the accepted norm.
I remember hearing once about Ramesh’s young granddaughter who was apparently quite spirited. Her mom was constantly trying to manage her. When once again she had done something she shouldn’t have and was reprimanded, she turned to her mom and said “But Mommy, I am just doing what God wants me to do.”
I am wondering where your cynicism and skepticism might actually be a gift that sets someone on a different path. Maybe some apple carts need to be turned over!
Thank you so much for commenting!
My first thought: it is *precisely* the irritation that polishes the diamond! 💎 It's perfect!
I love Irritated Heidi. I'm irritated, too. It is irritation that is the sand in the oyster that creates the pearl. Without irritation, I'm unmotivated to write or teach or create podcasts which do seem to benefit some. If I'm not bothered, I don't write. Nothing to respond to. Something has to itch! We just label it positive or negative, desirable or undesirable.
One last offering: if irritation arises - big, small or strangely indefinable - it immediately defuses into Embodied Awareness (out of the head) by claiming it. Oftentimes, you'll find me bopping around the house like a chicken, repeating, "I'm upset! I'm upset," in the moment. 🐓 Just expressing "upsetness" or irritation. No problem, no analysis - simply being the experiencing of upsetness.
Cheers to being polished!
(And, luckily I'm a coffee drinker so I've no need to invite anything to tea. 😂)
A deep bow to you, and Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj - my angry, irritable, beloved grandteacher - the master.🙏🏽
I am now officially changing being irritated to being bothered!
Yes- being bothered keeps me energized and on fire about things! I love this perspective.
I appreciate the image of defusion when a trait is claimed. That is brilliant! I have called that relief which is also true, but the experience more accurately feels like fog being blown away.
That’s quite a picture of your running around squawking😂
A deep bow back🙏
Thank you for your comments!
Thank you!
I also want to clarify a subtle difference between "claimed" which can easily turn into identification, and "being one with" or presencing with an energy quality. I know you know this. It's always present time. The one who is angry or bothered doesn't exist in the next moment. Time collapses and no one is there to be angry. Just the staccato uprising and disappearing.
In fact, it's involvement in time and space that create the idea of an angry person or any thing at all!
Food for no-thought. 😂